Honestly Kid

by Daniel Damkoehler


2nd thoughts

Keeping Your Head in the Game


A human head – not mine

I’m not doing so well at that whole head in game thing. Not today.

I have a lot of distractions.

Of course, it would help if I could decide exactly what my game is, I suppose.

Then again, see also my post on specialization.

Anyway, I’ve caused some minor disasters at work. Okay, maybe they aren’t minor. I suppose that depends on who you ask, but we agree on the disaster part.

So, now that we have a point of agreement, I suppose we can move on to solutions, right? Maybe you gentle readers can help me answer these questions:

How do you keep your head in your game(s)?

Why do we have trouble keepingĀ  our heads in our games?

Where is my head if not in the game?

What’s my game?

What’s yours?

4 Responses to “Keeping Your Head in the Game”

  1. Stasia » October 23rd, 2009

    Eckhart Tolle sums up my thoughts on this:
    “Wherever you are, be there totally. If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally”. “The pain that you create now is always some form of nonacceptance, some form of unconscious resistance to what is.”
    I believe this is so true in the sense that those really are the only three choices that will lead to any true change and in turn, hopefully, contentment.
    In regards to your question “Where is my head if not in the game?” I suggest that it is likely constantly trying to figure what fun, adventurous, exciting, NEW game you’d like to be playing in, and what position you’ll play, and for what team, and, and… But I offer that while you’re still in this one, play it whole heartedly so that you can bow out gracefully knowing you always gave it your all and move on to your grand new adventures that I know you will. Easier said than done, I know. I don’t mean by this to suggest you should just settle and stay in this game and forget moving on, but simply to be present where you are, when you are, will always feel better than the alternative in my opnion.

  2. dandam » October 23rd, 2009

    A) Have you and Laura been talking?
    B) Thank you for sharing some real wisdom. It’s the kind of stuff that’s impossible to remember when I’m looking for a new game.

  3. dMark » October 24th, 2009

    The advice from one of my yoga instructors continues to ring in my mind whenever I question what I’m currently doing. To paraphrase:

    “Do this one thing like you do everything.”

    I may be putting away the dishes but at the moment that’s exactly what I’m doing until it’s done.
    I get the feeling that I’m late to GTD trend ~2004-2007. I’ve read & reread the David Allen books; I subscribe to the podcasts; I follow Merlin Mann; I’ve invested a small fortune in list manager software. I’m even a dork with my own Hipster PDA.

    Among the many pieces of useful & semi-useful advice these are some of the things I’ve found:

    1) As we live our lives accumulate a critical mass of responsibilities & commitments.
    2) If you don’t manage them then they will either manage you and/or you will get lost.
    3) Don’t underestimate the amount of time & resources spent maintaining your current commitments. Beyond that is your opportunity for change.
    4) Make & maintain lists of your current & intended projects.
    5) When you’re in doubt about what you should be doing in the “bigger picture” start closing loops: water the plants, walk the dog, make the bed.

  4. dandam » October 28th, 2009

    I like that list, particularly the last item. Closing loops.

    It reminds me a little of what a friend who had gone through depression recovery (12-step for manic depression to over simplify) told me about the best way to feel better when depressed: make a list of all the things you see that need fixing from the smallest and closest at hand to the largest and furthest away, then start fixing from the place you’re in now going outward and don’t worry about perfection along the way. Pick up the coffee mug with mold growing in it next to your bed and wash it. Go make your bed. Take a shower. Put on clean clothes. A day or two of that and you can’t feel bad about the mess of your immediate surroundings. It’s not the whole answer to depression or life, but it seems like it is one of those fundamental things contemporary American culture teaches us to forget about. You know, how can you be well, keep your life together, and do all those little things of living if you haven’t watched the latest 15 episodes of whatever, and consumed everything in sight, etc?